Union Parents: Field notes from the Quarter / March 15, 2024

This winter, we embarked on a new adventure called the Union Family Quarter - a five-part series of gatherings designed for our community to grow together in connection, possibility, and resiliency.  

To be honest, we didn't have a map.  Just some big ideas that just kept bubbling up and expanding.  So why did we do this - something new and unproven? Checking back in my notes, we had three intentions:

• Developing greater COMMUNITY so that we all feel supported in this journey, and not alone. It is our goal to build bridges between the home and our faith community, and with one another. This is deeper than just a connection; it's a shared journey with one another.

• Offering POSSIBILITY with new growth opportunities through learning, resources, nourishment, and vitality.

• Fostering RESILIENCY for families, caregivers, and those who advocate for parents and children so we can better withstand the tough stuff of life, find ways to make repairs, and be flexible along the journey.  This allows us to more fully be who God made us to be. 

Phew!  Those were big goals but notably worthy of pursuing. 

And as I have participated in each of the three previous events, it has humbled me to realize how much I need to learn and how grateful I am for this community and the learning  we get to share together.  

The 2024 Quarter will come to an end next Sunday with our last gathering led by Dr. Jenny Lee Vaydick. As a follow up, I will email a survey to get your field notes, thoughts, suggestions, and critiques of the Union Family Quarter.  All feedback will serve a guide for a new set of gatherings in early 2025.

My personal field notes are peppered with thankfulness, hope, and an overflowing excitement about what is happening within our community.  Thank YOU for participating and a HUGE thank you to Renee Notkin, Renée Sundberg, and Phil Lewis who have truly made this endeavor toward greater community, possibility and resiliency a reality.  To God be the glory!  

See you on Sunday!

Ephesians 1:15-18 (NIV)
"For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all God’s people, I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people,"

Union Parents: The good work of creation care / March 8, 2024

This Sunday is a Second Sunday and it's been just over a year since we started focusing these Sundays on tangible ways to care for the world and be people of justice.  It's been our desire to show kids how they can join with God aa a world changer, harbinger of hope, and a steward of the earth. Creation care work helps kids to connect to the good work of "exercising dominion" well and caring for what God called good.

This week, Olivia, Kathy, and our Union Kids team will start working on tending a garden at 415 Westlake with the help of our kids, as well as making a delicious tossed salad for the Second Sunday meal. These endeavors care for our earth and feed our community.

What about engaging kids in creation care other days of the week at your home?  You may not have a green thumb or space for a garden, and that's ok.  You and your kids can also try some other creation care, like this suggestions from author,  Meredith Miller:

• Picking up trash in your neighborhood while on a walk.  Just make it a habit, rather than turning into a full clean up day.

• Compost your food scraps (which many of us already do).  Maybe even create a compost or worm bin in your own yard to enrich the soil.

• Become members of a zoo or aquarium, an animal conservation group, or a botanical society to better understand what the challenges and opportunities there are when it comes to stewarding our world.  (I have joined the Washington Farmland Trust.)

• Listen to a conservation-themed podcast for kids like Earth Ranger Emma or watch PBS Kids' Wild Kratts to learn more about the amazing creatures that God has created. These can inspire kids (and adults)! 

Our Union Kids are often already thinking about these things and we take our cues from them many times.  You may know that both the communion glasses and reusable coffee cups were both instituted from requests by Union Kids to be more sustainable. This is creation care.  

This is good work, worship in action on a Second Sunday and many other days of the week.  I'd love to hear what other families like to do to care for our earth. Ideas are welcomed!
 

Genesis 1:11-13 (NIV)
"Then God said, “Let the land produce vegetation: seed-bearing plants and trees on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds.” And it was so. The land produced vegetation: plants bearing seed according to their kinds and trees bearing fruit with seed in it according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good. And there was evening, and there was morning—the third day."

Genesis 2:15 (NIV)
"The Lord God took the human and put them in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it."

Union Parents: It's recorder season / March 1, 2024

Apparently, Lent is also recorder season.  If you haven't experienced the power of this plastic instrument, you will have the pleasure one day, I'm fairly certain. Elementary teachers have this ear-splitting curriculum built into every school.

So, I'm currently being serenaded with squeaks, blasts, and tweets that roughly sound like the Imperial March from Star Wars.  My blood pressure shot through the roof  - and will return to normal when my musician grows tired of making "music". 

The recorder is a perfect example for me of what reality is present during Lent. - joy in affliction.  We love our children - and we'd love them for them to play a tune on that thing and know if will come someday, but in the meantime, it is  a act of love not to run for the hills. We know that going through these days of musical torture will yield at least one decent song at the spring music concert and the chance to see your child smile big with accomplishment.

As we journey through Lent and embrace this season, there is a term called "Bright Sadness" that has often been given to this time.  It is joy in affliction or difficult feelings -  the longing for the fulfillment of our hope. It reminds us of the joy set before Him as He endured the cross. It is the now and not yet.  

As parents, we find joy in the seasons that bring challenge or hardship. While some stages can be fun and enjoyable, other stages and times of learning may leave you wondering if you can hold on.  But we do - we hold on, anticipating what good thing is yet to come. 

If you are up at 2am nursing a baby - it's the now and not yet as you anticipate a full(er) night of sleep. If you are hoping that your child will pick up their clothes and put them in the laundry - it's the now and not yet of learning responsibility. If you are watching the first year of soccer, it's the now and not yet of seeing those kids work as a team and not just move in a giant huddle of shin guards and cleats. And if you seeing your child struggle in any way, it's the now and not yet of moving through this stage and growing into more maturity or proficiency.

The bright sadness we acknowledge in Lent reminds us that we await the fulfillment of our hopes (for our lives, families, community and world), but we are not abandoned in the now.  We are beloved.  What does this term "bright sadness" stir in you?

Thankfully, the recorder has now been put away until the next practice sesh. This musical hardship is part of the parenting journey and part of the joy.  


Hebrews 12:1-2 (NIV)
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Union Parents: The humbling self-checkout line / February 23, 2024

There is something extremely humbling and exposing about the self-checkout line. Like you are on stage.

As the line of shoppers builds behind the checkout, you search various packaged goods to find where is that hidden bar code to scan, or you hear the jarring announcement to "please place the item in the bag", or you face the struggle to quickly unload your cart from top to bottom while impatient people with one item in hand watch your every move.

For me, that self-checkout line can be a humbling experience, even if I am trying my best. I'm left wondering how the cashiers do it so fast and effortlessly. Parenting has that same effect, too - humbling and exposing and leaves me wondering at times.

In this season of Lent, I'm reminded that we as parents are often stripped of what we hold on to, even as we try our best. Jesus tells us that sometimes all we can do is hold on to the Father (because that's all we really have anyway).  

This past week, I watched an episode of Season Three of The Chosen where Jesus instructs His disciples to go outto the countryside and share the good news, two by two, but with the caveat to take nothing - no clothes, food, money, or sleeping bag. When the disciple push back on this plan, "Say what??", He explains, "I'm teaching you to rely on the Father."

As I sat with the weight of Jesus' words, I thought how appropriate this felt for parenting, too.  Relying on the Father. 

Like the self-checkout line, we are humbled by the process of parenting and find that we are struggling to do it well. I know I am. As we are striped of our own devices - by children who are different than we are, the challenges of parenting in our culture, unexpected circumstances that we are unprepared to weather - we are really only left with one tool:  prayer.  If you are like me, you are humbled to pray for trust, wisdom, help, patience, and for our daily bread.

But the Jesus goes with us and before us, we are gently asked to trust Him in parenthood. Because Jesus understand the challenge of relying on the Father as he humbled Himself unto death on a cross.

So, the next time you are going through the self-checkout line, maybe pause and remember God's trustworthiness even in this humbling journey called parenting, called life, our God is there, helping lift the load and push the cart.   

Psalm 25:4-5 (NIV)
Show me your ways, Lord,
    teach me your paths.
Guide me in your truth and teach me,
    for you are God my Savior,
    and my hope is in you all day long.

Union Parents: When God ran / February 16, 2024

This Lent season we are focusing on embracing God's love for us and seeing how we are embraced.

As parents, we often don't receive the reciprocal love or care that we shower on our children.  It's just not the role that kids play - they sponge up the love we give and that's how they grow into healthy, adjusted people (eventually).  We have to get our love from Someone else.  We need that supernatural love embrace to keep going.

When I was a teen, there was a popular Christian music song called "When God Ran".  It's truly in the 80s contemporary Christian genre - so the music might not thrill you - but the lyrics always touched my heart.  When God ran.  When the Father saw the son way off in the distance, He didn't wait for the son to approach.  He didn't even walk down the driveway to meet him at the mailbox.  He ran.  He embraced the son and showered him with love and acceptance, forgiveness and hope.

This Sunday, we'll be talking about the Prodigal Son story and I hope you'll see it as an encouragement to you when the parenting gets hard, when the pre-teens want their way, when the little ones just need you so much that you are drained, when you just aren't sure you have any more to give. God runs to us in all our circumstances, faith or doubt, in all we do or not do - and embraces us with the biggest hug and kiss.  

Have you been hugged by our God today?

Luke 15:20 (New Living Translation)
So he returned home to his father. And while he was still a long way off, his father saw him coming. Filled with love and compassion, he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him.

Union Parents: Ordinary ways & everyday therapies / February 9, 2024

This past Monday night, we were able to hear from Laura Benton, M.S., LMFT, as she spoke on Contending for Connection: Fresh Vision for Youth Mental Health. It was a great time to learn from a mental health expert, who had a wealth of good information to share about a current and emotional topic.

As she talked, Laura encouraged us that very simple, ordinary things are an opportunity to create connection. She said that this mental health crisis moment can be a time to see things differently and be a turning point for hope. We have the opportunity to help our youth create a bigger story for their lives.  

Hope can start with some ordinary measures like this that create connection:
- Communicate openly and honestly, including about your values
- Spend time with your child in shared activities
- Guide children to make healthy, wise decisions
- Help with homework
- Volunteer at your child's school

Then building on that, you can help your child move from dis-regulation to regulation by weaving these everyday therapeutic practices into daily life:
- Connection to family and community
- Movement - exercise, yoga, running, dance, walking, etc.
- Breathing and meditation
- Spiritual practices like prayer, worship, journaling, hiking, meditating
- Sleep - getting enough!
- Screen-free time
- Practicing scripture

Mental health is a complex issue and there isn't often an easy answer around the struggles we all face.  So, maybe just a few some baby steps toward connection and emotional regulation is all that's possible.  That's okay!  As Laura said, we have this opportunity for a change, for hope, for a new outlook. Exploring these ordinary ways to connect and everyday therapies to move from dis-regulation to regulation that Laura shared can show our children that they are seen, known and accepted. That they belong and matter.

Union Parents: Nuggets of encouragement / February 2, 2024

This past Sunday was our Worship in Action Sunday and 415 Westlake was humming with projects, people, food, connections, and prayer.  Have you been to a Fourth Sunday before?  It's a great space to let kids belong before they believe and to find meaningful ways to contribute. Let us know if you or your kids have an idea or project we could weave into our Fourth Sunday mornings. We love new ideas!

Following Worship in Action, parent coach Kelly Hampton presented on Parenting Wins - How to Develop a Mindset that Sets You Up for Years to Come. What an encouraging time it was to learn from her wisdom.   Kelly encouraged parents to slow down (unless someone is bleeding or broken), take time to interact with kids when there is a challenge, and reflect back to them how they are feeling so you can move to a connected and calmer place. She says she tells herself this mantra every day.

And if you didn't have a chance to hear Kelly, we will have her back, so stay tuned for the next workshop details. (One parent who attended said she could listen to Kelly every month!)  Also, her power point slides can be accessed in the link above if you'd like to flip through them for more of her nuggets of encouragement. We are not alone!

Union Parents: Meredith Miller coming this Monday! / January 17, 2024

How do we know God and discover that God can be trusted? 

That is the question Meredith Miller, author of Woven: Nurturing a Faith Your Kid Doesn't Have to Heal From, is asking around faith formation in families and our faith communities.

Whether we are trying to help kids and teens anchor to who God is and have faith practices that are rich, textured, and all their own, or we, as adults, are trying to embrace and share a faith that is so much bigger, vital and resilient than the list of rules we were taught as kids.

You are invited to come, learn, and bring your questions 
about nurturing the kind of faith that can flex and grow, be broken and repaired.

Meredith can also address topics like:
- When are kids ready to participate in church?
- How do we guide children toward making a decision for God?
- How do you navigate different faith approaches within family relationships?
- What do we do with hard scripture and how do we teach it to kids?
- How do you parent in a pluralistic culture?

This is for not only for families with children and youth, but is also for the whole Union community as aunts, uncles, godparents, grandparents, educators, volunteers and those who are invested in the future generation and church!

I am looking forward to Monday and hope I'll see you on Zoom from 7:30-9pm!  
Please register for Meredith's presentation here.  You may also submit your questions through this link:
https://unionchurch.breezechms.com/form/4bb4c2

Union Parents: Parenting wins with Kathy and Kelly / January 12, 2024

You may recall that I had the opportunity to speak to some Union parents on a Fourth Sunday this past fall and  ask, "What's on your mind?" I heard parents say things like, 

"I need support!"
"How do we make our family thrive?"
"Knowing how to de-escalate tantrums would be helpful."
"Sibling fights are so hard."

You, too?  This is why I'm thrilled for our Union Family Quarter #2: 
Parenting Wins - How to Develop A Mindset That Sets You Up For Years To Come
Presented by Kathy Foster and Kelly Hampton 

Here's a little more detail about what you can expect from the session.  Hope you will join us on January 28 following worship.

In parenting, there is a constant tension between the positive characteristics we want our children to possess and the struggles we see our kids experience. We want our kids to be kind, but they yell at their siblings. We want to raise problem-solvers, but they steal other kids' toys when they don't get their way. We want our kids to be responsible for their stuff, but they never pick up their toys. 

There is wonderful correlation between the struggles our kids experience and the characteristics we hope to grow in our kids. In this 1- hour workshop, we will explore how the two are connected and how we can use that to help shape our parenting. How we think about conflict directly impacts how we react to the struggles we have with our kids. You will leave the workshop with a new framework that will propel you forward in your parenting decision for years to come. 

About Kathy Foster:
Kathy Foster has more than 30 years of experience as an early childhood educator and parent educator.  She expertly leads Union Kids on Sunday mornings  and the weekly Play & Learn program at 415 Westlake.

About Kelly Hampton:
Kelly Hampton has been a passionate educator for over 15 years. Most recently she was the co-founder and director of a preschool hosted in the Ronald McDonald House providing preschool services to patients at Seattle Children’s.  She is currently a first grade teacher with the Edmonds School District. In 2022, she launched Kelly Hampton Coaching to support and empower moms, dads, and caregivers to become the parents they want to be by harnessing more playfulness, connection, and balance with their kids. She uses a strengths-based approach to help her clients clarify their family values and live into them.

Union Parents: Welcome to Union Family Quarter / January 5, 2024

Welcome to 2024!  As we settle into this new year, I'm excited to share with you this upcoming series called Union Family Quarter.  

Born out of a collective effort to listen to what parents and our Union community need, this series is designed to encourage and support us as we build hope, strength and resiliency together. This "winter quarter" of education will cover a variety of important and relevant topics that we hope will create conversation and connection within our community and beyond.  Some topics will be more applicable to your situation than others, so you can use this series as a menu to engage with what resonates with you,

Here is the lineup for your reference:

Meredith Miller
Author of Woven: Nurturing a Faith Your Kid Doesn’t Have to Heal From 
A Discussion on Faith Formation
Monday, January 22 | 7:30-9pm | Zoom

Kelly Hampton and Kathy Foster
Parenting Wins - How to Develop a Mindset that Sets You Up for Years to Come 
Sunday, January 28 | 11:30am -1 2:30pm | In-person
(childcare will be available)

Laura Benton, M.S, LMFT
Contending for Connection: Fresh Vision for Youth Mental Health
Monday, February 5 | 7:30-9pm | Zoom

Panel Discussion Moderated by Phil Lewis
Journeying with LGBTQ+ Youth as Family & Community
Sunday, March 17 | 11:30am - 12:30pm | In-person
(childcare will be available)

Jenny Lee Vaydich
Associate Professor of Psychology, Seattle Pacific University
Conflict in the Home
Sunday, March 24 | 11:30am - 12:30pm | In-person
(childcare will be available)

If you have any questions at all, please don't hesitate to reach out at tsharon@unionchurchseattle.org.  
I'm looking forward to this journey with you!

I Thessalonians 5:11 (NIV)
"Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing."

Union Parents: Free on January 22, 2024? / December 29, 2023

The new year is just around the corner and I’m getting excited for 2024 to arrive. 

One reason is that Union will be hosting a speaker - Meredith Miller - that I think is very dynamic in terms of faith formation. Meredith is the author of Woven: Nurturing a Faith Your Kid Doesn't Have to Heal From, a book I've referenced a few times this fall.

Not only does she address issues like moralistic therapeutic deism, she provides guidance on how to provide kids the space they need to explore the Bible, ask big questions, and even change their understanding of God and faith along the way.  This approach can help children anchor to who God is and have faith practices that are rich, textured, and all their own.
 
If you are like me, you desire to share your faith and love for God with your children, but don't necessarily want to do it in the same way you were taught. As Meredith shares, we hope our kids see that God is so much bigger than the list of do’s and don’ts. Her faith formation work is important for parents, families, youth and really anyone who's grown up in the church. This is a time that is designed to encourage and support each other as we build hope, strength, and resiliency together.

I hope you'll mark your calendar for January 22, 2024 at 7:30pm-9pm.  And if you'd like to submit a question to Meredith in advance, she will prepare answers for the Zoom call, as well as have a live Q & A time following her presentation.

For more about Meredith Miller, here is her Instagram account:
https://www.instagram.com/meredithannemiller/

If you'd like tp purchase her book in advance, here is a link to the publisher's preferred site:
https://www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/meredith-miller/woven/9781546004356/

Union Parents: Interrupting the dark / December 22, 2023

We have been exploring Jesus' birth as the great interruption in our lives with disturbing words as our Advent focus at Union. 

As Christmas approaches, I have appreciated this prayer by Henri Nouwen and  I've listened to it daily this week - reminding me of the light of Jesus breaking into the darkness of our world and the hectic nature of our daily lives.

Lord Jesus,
Master of both the light and the darkness, send your Holy Spirit upon our preparations for Christmas.
We who have so much to do seek quiet spaces to hear your voice each day.
We who are anxious over many things look forward to your coming among us.
We who are blessed in so many ways, long for the complete joy of your kingdom.
We whose hearts are heavy seek the joy of your presence.
We are your people, walking in darkness, yet seeking the light. 
To you we say, "Come Lord Jesus!"
Amen.

May the tender mercy of our God shine and guide us all along the path of peace as live, love and parent - because we know that Jesus brings us into the light of God's love.  We are interrupted for good.  Merry Christmas!

1 John 2:8b (NIV)
"...the darkness is passing and the true light is already shining."

Union Parents: Night season / December 15, 2023

Although today the sun is breaking through, soon it will be setting as the days are short this time of year.  Some even call it the Big Dark and the longest night is coming on December 21. It's a time when light is precious.

And while most of us prefer light and the longer days (rather than long, dark nights), there is something to be said for the night season - both the physical season we experience each winter and the times of trial in our lives. There is a clarity to night that allows us to see what we can't understand when things are bright and sunny in our lives.  While I don't revel in darkness and it can often be a difficult or discouraging time, it becomes abundantly clear what is important to us when we are faced with tough choices or difficult experiences.  The darkness lets us see where our heart is focused.

I think of Mary, pregnant and about to be put away by Joseph, facing a night season.  She must have clung to those words from the angel - trying to keep her faith that all would be well.  That night season created the need for hope.

I think of Joseph, fresh off another angel message, wondering how he could reconcile the instructions to stick with Mary and his cultural rulebook. This whole situation took him off guard and his night season created the need for faith.

I think of the shepherds who saw the host of angels singing in the dark night.  Would they have been able to take in the huge spectacle as completely had the sun been shining that day?  It was in the darkness that Joy showed up and sent them running for an unknown stable like contestants on the Amazing Race.  That night season created a need for action.

Are you experiencing a night season?  I have found myself in one that crept up on me.  And I'm finding that my night season is requiring me to live into hope, faith and action - whether I'm ready or not.  My night season is creating a stage that allows the warmth and light of our community and God's presence and love to shine so brightly that I cannot ignore it.  I'm walking gingerly through this time as wait for the Light of the World to show me my next steps.  This is all not easy, but I'm comforted that God is with me (and with us) and the night season will not have the last word.  We are not overcome.  The Light has dawned.

John 1:4-5 (NIV)
"In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it."

Union Parents: Externally-focused gingerbread / December 8, 2023

It is no secret that food is a big part of our Union community life. From sandwich-making to Thanksgiving meals to burrito-rolling and more, food is woven in our external focus.  This week's gingerbread house decorating, while not as edible as a brown bag lunch, is another way we are using food to serve our neighbors.  

Tell me more, you say?  I'm glad you asked.  Gingerbread is simply a reason to gather.  A reason to be present and a way to be externally-focused.  It's another touch point for those in our Union community with Compass House and Play & Learn.

Speaking of Play & Learn, I want to share what is brewing there, as we welcomed the largest group of children and adults so far this fall on December 6. Parents, caregivers, grandparents, neighbors and nannies are coming with their young children. They are finding community and I'm honored to say, that I'm finding community with them, too.  It's a give and take and we all win. 

As we welcome more folks through the doors on Wednesday mornings, we are finding it's often those who are new to Seattle who walk in. They are looking for a place to take their young child and meet other parents in this city.  At Union (and Kakao), we have the opportunity to be that place that creates community for people like G. from Australia awaiting his work visa and his 18- month-old daughter, or for P. from Chile by way of Los Angeles and her toddler daughter, or for G. and the children whom she nannies for, or for A. who has a three-year-old, but dreams of finishing her Ph.d, among others. 

So, this weekend, when Tauryn Beeman, Kathy Foster, Renee Notkin, Olivia Hill, Chandra Jamerson, Theo Helt, and Jermaine Harris help to welcome friends from Play & Learn, Compass House, and our larger Union community for this holiday event, you'll know that this gingerbread is a conduit for connection.  A venue to serve our neighbors.  It is a way to be in the community and be the hands and feet of Jesus, the Bread of Life, in a very delicious way.

It's a externally-focused gingerbread.  Bless this food.

John 6:35 (NIV)
"Then Jesus declared, 'I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty."

Union Parents: Heartache and joy / December 1, 2023

Risking some redundancy, I wanted to share a little from the introduction to the 25 Days of Love and Justice, compiled by two Union parents, Sayuko Setvik and Nichelle Keatley.

If you signed up for the daily email they deliver throughout Advent, you may have read this already. (And if you haven't signed uo, you can always do so at truthandjustice.union@gmail.com.)

What struck me in their intro email was the tension between heartache and joy.  Between hope and hopelessness.  Between the now and the not yet.  This time of year is a season of longing and waiting and parenting is very much the same experience year round. We long to see our kids grow into who God created them to be, while holding the tension of parenting in the moment.  Not only that, we are parenting in a world that is filled with injustice, hurt, fear....and hope.  Parenting is a complicated vocation, for many reasons.

Sayuko and Nichelle wrote:
"In the midst of the horrific suffering in Palestine & Israel, the ongoing war between Ukraine & Russia, violence and starvation in many African countries, mass shooting every day in the U.S., illness, heartbreak, and difficulty in our personal lives, it is easy to feel overwhelmed and hopeless. This Advent, we are intentionally journeying with both heartache and joy. 

How do we hold God's justice and God's love simultevusaly?
How can we name and experience the injustices in the Bible and in the wold, while holding onto God's goodness at the same time?

We invite you to ponder these questions this season, just as Mary and Joseph embraced the joy of Jesus, while at the same time witnessing terrible suffering around them. We were not created to live in isolation, but rather in community. “Rejoice with those who rejoice; weep with those who weep.” (Romans 12:15) For us, the answer is together. Our hearts are big enough to hold multiple things together at the same time. We mourn, grieve, and cry with those who are suffering. AND we laugh and sing with those who are happy. We stop to ask about someone’s pain, and hopefully, collectively, we can lighten the burden a tiny bit."

As we walk through Advent these next week, we do it together as we work for the light of justice to shine bright, while living in the difficult tension of a world that needs our Lord.  As you are present at Union in the next few Advent Sundays, maybe try asking someone about their experience with this tension of heartache and joy, and as Sayuko and Nichelle say, you may find that this little act will lighten their burden and create an inbreaking of hope.

Isaiah 9:2
"The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of deep darkness a light has dawned."

Union Parents: How big is love? / November 24, 2023

Advent season is just around the corner.  Maybe you've started putting up your tree and preparing for this most festive time of the year: the coming of our Savior. While Christmas (and even Advent) can be wrapped up in a lot of hype and commercialism, we know that the heart of this season is that love came down, broke through.  God with us. Immanuel. Love is central to God's choice to be in relationship with us.  

Recently, Jade and I were at the library and I saw this book by Emma Dodd called "How Big is Love".  As I read this book with the perspective that we are God's children, I felt like these words were worth sharing with you. God loves us with big love. This is the love we receive and the love we endeavor to shower on our children, as best we humanly can.  

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How Big Is Love?
by Emma Dodd

Before you can, I did not know just how big love could be.

It's wider than the ocean, it's deeper than the sea.

Love's taller than the mountains, it stretches way up high.

Farther than the farthest star, way beyond the sky.

Love goes on and on and on, it fills your heart and mine.

Love's brighter than the brightest light.  It makes the whole world shine.

Love never, ever changes, no matter what life brings.

Love lifts you up when you are down. It helps you find your wings.

Love is all around you every single day. And even when life gets hard ,love never goes away.

And you, my loves, have taught me what I know is true: there is nothing bigger than the love I feel for you.

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Friends, may you feel the light and depth of God's big love this coming Advent season in new ways.

I John 3:1 (NIV)
See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!

Union Parents: Provisions and the Provider / November 17, 2023

Dear Union Parents,

This last month or so, Union has been hosting Harvest Dinners around the region.  Union folks opened their homes to their neighbors and community to share our lives together in gratitude.

I participated (and enjoyed a lovely meal!) at the Harvest Dinner hosted at Peter and Marcia Lyons' home. As our dinner concluded, Peter grabbed his notebook and said, "I wrote a little something that I wanted to share." And I'm so glad he did.  I felt like it was a poignant Thanksgiving and gratitude message that left me pondering where I find my provisions and do I trust the Provider.

Harvest Dinner Refections
by Peter Lyons

"Share the joy of the harvest and the gift of community," we are reminded in Exodus 23:16. Part of our deeper faith tradition is to celebrate the Festival of Harvest.  We do this by gathering together with and giving thanks for God's abundant provision.

Some of us here get our hands in the soil a little more than others, but none of us relies on farming as directly as the Israelites did in the time of Moses when these festivals were first celebrated.  Some of us have seasons in our work, but most of us do nearly the same work all year. This makes it a little harder to see God's abundant provision in our lives since we didn't see a pile of wheat or corn and know we are good for another year. Even if it's harder, it's worth the effort to look back and see how the Lord has taken care of us again and that he is as he's always been: Jehovah Jirah - the Lord our Provider.

As we move into Thanksgiving week, may these words from Peter's pen encourage you to see where God has provided and walks with us as our Provider.  I'm so thankful for this community and God's abundant provision for our children and families as we grow together in community. God is always good.

Maybe take some time to ponder...where has God taken care of you and your family this past year?

Matthew 6:25-25 (NIV)
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?"

Union Parents: Trust and rest / November 10, 2023

As I've been going through the fall small group study on Sabbath, I've been struck by this intertwining theme of trust and rest.  As we know, the 10 Commandments tell us to keep the Sabbath and to rest.  And while physical rest is definitely important for the human race, I'm finding that the rest can be more related to my posture toward God.

I find that rest comes with trust.

But do I trust that he can carry me through difficult times? Am I willing to rest knowing that I can't do any more today? Where are the place that I fail to trust that God and give over the outcome to Him?  Places like my children's school choice, the friends they make, the grades they receive, what they learn about God from me, or the character that is being cultivated in them?

Those are some tender places where my heart wants to trust that God is good. And will continue to be care for my children as they grow and even when I cannot be there.  As I've continued to read Meredith Miller's book, I'm seeing how trust in God and His goodness is where my heart needs to be.  She explains that connection and belonging bring us (and children) to trusting in God.  Instead of trying to work toward obedience and perfection, but reminding myself of God's goodness, I can live into trust and rest. Easier said than done, but as I lean into God's character, I find that real rest is more accessible. 

Parents often feel that rest is completely elusive and when it comes to actual sleep, I agree!  But when I think about rest as a result of how I view God, it's a broader definition that encompasses my inner life and one that actually allows my spirit to take a breath, so to speak, and be re-energized. 

What do you think about the connection of trust and rest?  Does that ring true for you?  Is there a place where trusting God would allow you to find greater peace and rest?

Matthew 11:28-30 (The Message)
“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

Union Parents: Ratatouille and community under the roof / November 3, 2023

Who knew a rat could tell such a great story?  And bring people together?  I believe that Remy the Rat from Ratatouille can do just that.  

Ratatouille is a story of triumph, together. Somehow when a chef and a rat meet, they establish trust and communication, and when Linguini, the chef, gets credit for a soup that the Remy has saved with strategic seasonings, they team up.  It's a match made in Paris.

Roger Ebert wrote at the film's debut, "All of this [movie] begins as a dubious premise and ends as a triumph of animation, comedy, imagination and, yes, humanity."

And in our post-Covid era and our scarred, hurting world, I think the more stories we hear about teamwork, triumph, humanity, and life together, the more we are reminded that we need each other.  When we team up, we can do greater things.

Not only is Ratatouille an engaging story, the movie night gives our broader community a chance to gather, have a meal, play, and watch together.  I'm excited that we'll have the opportunity to bring children, caregivers, parents, and other adults from Union, Cafe Club, Compass House, and Play and Learn under the 415 Westlake roof at one time.  The blending of people from different parts of Union allows us to see how God is creating a tapestry of places for connection, belonging, and, I daresay, healing.

I hope you and your people will be able to join us next Saturday, November 11.  Spaghetti dinner will be served at 4:30 and we'll start the movie shortly after that.  There will also be a place for babies to play, games, and an art table for those who want to do something with their hands while they watch. 

Would love to see you there!

Want to see more of Ratatouille?  Watch the 2007 trailer:
https://youtu.be/NgsQ8mVkN8w?si=VYvYPltZAPVe8x0x

Hebrews 10:24-25 (NIV)
"And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching."

Union Parents: Everything is temporary / October 27, 2023

I recently saw this post on a parenting page and thought it was very poignant. It seems that once we parents get in a groove, our kids have found a new favorite food, a new routine or reach a new development milestone.

But wait, I'm not ready!  It's all happening so quick.

Loving these little people sometimes means that I must let them grow even when I'm finding it hard to accept the new normal.  Some days I am definitely ready for a new phase but there are many days I want to freeze them forever and hold tightly to the present. 

I've always been comforted by the thought that Christ goes before us in everything and lives in the future (and past), just as much as  in the present. God transcends time.  That truth allows me to step into the next phase of parenting knowing that Christ meets me there and nothing is a surprise to him. We are gently held by our Provider and Sustainer...in all things.

Does this post below resonate with you?  Where does the temporary feel hard (and sometimes unending) and where do you find that you are relived that "this too shall pass"?  Where are you feeling the joy of moving through stages and experiencing your children's growth?

Philippians 1:6
“And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ”

Everything - the Hard and Amazing - is Temporary
Ever notice how everything in parenting, from the amazing to the challenging, seems to be temporary? One moment, your little one is a cuddly bundle content with just milk and sleep, and the next, they're a curious explorer on a mission to touch, taste, and topple everything in sight! Then, before we know it, they’re off to school making new friends and learning new things. Everything... is temporary.

And while this can tug at our heartstrings, there's beauty in this transience. The sleepless nights? Temporary. The overwhelming firsts? Temporary. The diaper changes? Temporary (Thank goodness!). But let's not forget - the tiny hand holding yours, the sweet baby coos, the innocent wonder in their eyes - that too, is all temporary.

So, let's enjoy every moment, embrace every phase, and remember that each stage, however fleeting, is an essential chapter in our incredible journey of parenthood. Embrace the temporariness! After all, it’s what makes every moment precious and every memory priceless.