A fish fry at the break of dawn on the shores of the Sea of Galliee. No one expected to see Jesus making breakfast for some of the disciples after His resurrection. But there He was serving fish and bread after a long and unsuccessful night of fishing by the weary disciples. And to top it off, Jesus had commanded a huge catch (again) to fill their boat to nearly bursting.
This story from John 21 came to mind this week when I was super frustrated with Justin. Man, I love that kid to pieces but he can sure push my buttons sometimes. He'd aggravated his brother (again) and that never ends well between the two. This time was no different. I was mad at him but I knew if I came home and argued with Justin, nothing would change. And if I'd let my gut reactions go wild, I'd drive a wedge instead of finding a way to build a bridge. I know, because I've tried that before. I needed to give him some food and some grace.
As I drove home, I texted Justin to meet me outside. "I'm taking you to get something to eat," I said. We started with a meal of his favorite food and I told him that I wanted to talk. Sitting at the outdoor tables at PCC, we had a chance to talk about how he was feeling. How we could do things differently. How we could function better as a family when we talk about how we feel and work toward more love. We came up with a plan that he liked for the month of July to create a new family dynamic - that has plan has worked for two days and counting.
I'm sure we'll need to address these sibling issues again, but my hope is that I can meet our kids at the deepest needs and propel them to a greater purpose by feeding them grace and guiding them to love. I pray I can do this time and time again. Regulating my gut reactions to serve up some grace and connection with my people.
Back to the shores of Galilee, Jesus did not have to reinstate Peter that morning after giving him a meal. He could have walked away, just as Peter had done in his denial on a recent Thursday night. But not only does He show up, Jesus hands Peter a plate of warm food and a mammoth helping of grace and gently asks, "Do you love me? Then, feed my lambs."
While Peter might deserve something far less, Jesus guides him into his purpose - leadership, kindness, and a provider of sustenance to those who need to be fed physically, emotionally and spiritually. That is the same purpose that I hope and pray that Justin will live out as an older brother and a citizen of this world someday.
It started with grace and plate of food.
P.S. Oddly enough, as I was writing this yesterday, Caden caught a fish at the West Seattle dock! Actually he caught two, while only one other fish had been caught all day on the pier. He fried it up this morning and had fish for breakfast. :)
John 21:9-12, 15 (NIV)
When they landed, they saw a fire of burning coals there with fish on it, and some bread.
Jesus said to them, “Bring some of the fish you have just caught.” So Simon Peter climbed back into the boat and dragged the net ashore. It was full of large fish, 153, but even with so many the net was not torn. Jesus said to them, “Come and have breakfast.” None of the disciples dared ask him, “Who are you?” They knew it was the Lord.
When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me more than these?”
“Yes, Lord,” he said, “you know that I love you.”
Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.”